I'm Scaring Myself

The duality is frightening. I'm losing what little power over my vengence that I may have had. My anger, my rage has become bigger than I myself can contain. My shrink sees it and has said something at work. Spook looks at me funny sometimes and Blazic is watching me closer than I think he should. But I don't care. I know their only interest is in whether I can perform my duties. They needn't worry about it. I have better control and I think I'm better at parking my personals while I'm working.

I go home tomorrow morning. I ended up skipping dinner last night and spent the time formulating my next action in this whole thing. This is what has me unnerved. That I seem to be quite comfortable with the plots dancing in my mind. I have the hospital convinced that I am from capt crunch's church group and my near-daily status calls are concern not curiosity.

She's doing much better today, thank you. The feeding tube came out and she's recovering nicely. Woo-friggin-hoo.